Duckman aka Ruggity Rug the Rug Muncher, one of the 5 pillars of black out fridays, is leaving toronto to begin his pursuit of a gordon gecko inspired career of debauchery and depravity on Wall Street.
Duckman is often credited with "Bringing Blackout Back", after a large stint of being a raging pot-head and reality tv fiend, duckman reemerged on the Black Out Friday scene with a great dedication and fervor to getting completely annihilated.
He receives special accolades for being the first Black Out Artist to receive free room and board in the Toronto drunk tank as well as for his well known personal mantra that "there is no rug that the ruggity rug wont munch".
Duck is single-handedly responsible for the erosion of Canadian-Venezuelan relations through his repeated trips to Venezuela where he refuses to refer to the local people as anything but Mexican.
No single Black Out Artist before him has generated as much respect amongst his peers for his ability to disappear after a predrink and end up at a bar filled with "freaks wearing dog collars".
He is also very well known in Toronto's Asian community. One source says "Oh yeah, I know Duckman. He's the asshole who thinks we're all Chinese and only speak Mandarin." The source, who requested to remain anonymous, continued that "The first time I met Duckman, he ran up to me and my girlfriend, began slurring terrible mandarin at me and the proceeded to hit on my girlfriend and make references to the angle in which her baby-maker rests". The Muncher than followed up that racial tirade with the line 'the ruggity rug hasnt tasted the sideways snatch"
Duckman has a reknowned hatred for all things douchey. On a recent trip to Jamaica he coined the term "Douche Baggette"- noun: a douche bag that hasnt fully reached maturity. He also popularized the term "Douche Baggery" - verb: the act of being a douche bag
We here at Black Out Fridays know that this is just the beginning of the Ruggity Rug. He represents the globalization of Black Out Fridays and has unintentionally become the Black Out ambassador to the United States. Duckity Duck truly is responsible for bringing black out drunk to the masses
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment