5.26.2010

The De-Evolution of Blackout Fridays

Over the past several months a transformation has been taken place within the inner workings of blackout Fridays that will forever change the face of these renowned artisans of debauchery. The reasons for this change are varying depending on whom you speak with. Some attribute it to the lack of weed being smoked by certain individuals within the group while others have begun applying the age old principals of grand-master Waugh.

Now we dont have time to go over all the varying principles of the grand-master but instead have choosing to present the most applicable teachings. Like other great men of the past the Grand Master preached a life of excess and debauchery. He taught that the only way to fully overcome your hangover and to eliminate them all together was too never escape from the blissful stages of blackout. In order to not experience the hangover you must drink more often. Now we are not talking the Hair of The Dog theory, which is applicable in its own right, but what we are talking about here is that by drinking every day your body begins to build up resistance to the hangover.

"To best ones hangover, one must first best themselves." 
Grand-Master Waugh

Hangovers become weaker and weaker as you experience them more often. This means that your BOF hangover will not be nearly as severe if you've been drinking all week because your body is not going into a state of shock.

There have been many scientific studies done recently that confirm the Grand-Masters teaching. A recent study by Cambridge University pointed out that "students who go out drinking more than 5 times a week say hangovers have very little effect on their ability to attend class."[1] Maybe its not their hangovers but their degenerate lifestyle that is inhibiting their ability to goto class yet science proves otherwise. Thomas Kupper from the Harvard Medical School agrees with this noting that "students who go out and binge drink once a week have a much higher rate of alcohol poisoning than those we call 'marathon' drinkers. A marathon drinker and a binge drinker will consume the same amount of liquor in a night but the marathon drinkers body is much more adept at breaking alcohol down and extracting the important vitamins and minerals from it on a daily basis." .[2]This has done nothing but reaffirm the grandmasters drinkings teachings. That being the more you drink the less your hungover when you are drinking copious amounts of liquor on the reg. If you go out on friday and drink a 40 of vodka then YES you will be hungover, unless from monday - thursday you drank a 26 each night. In that case your saturday will be filled with eternal bliss and after you Black Out Friday you will be ready for a Piece of Shit Saturday and maybe follow it up with a Sloppy Sunday then your back into the cycle starting off with Morose Mother Fuck Mondays.

Comments on my first 8 Hours in London

So I arrived in London about 6-7 hours ago ive lost count.. all i know is i got into my hotel (balling ass hotel) at 11:00pm. I went to the hotel bar that was full of drunk ass brits and started a serious time of reflection (which consisted of anywhere between 8-9 rusty nails, I thought it was 8 rusty's but the bar told me it was 9. It was a heated source of conflict that made me leave the bar).

The first thing I want to talk about it english birds. They old ones are straight up vultures, with no teeth and all. But the whole english byrds our age having poor oral hygiene is nothing but pure fallacy. I met this absolutely beautiful girl tonight whose teeth looked like they had been cared for by Dr. Brian Kotzer for her entire life. I was very into it until her dad told me she was 17.... --> Kasandra call me in 8 months if your not pregnant (Kasandra call me in 2 months if you've skipped your cycle, ill take care of you)

Now, the biggest difference I've noticed since moving here is by far the music. The biggest difference being that an international artist will release a single in North America (NA) totally different to that released in Europe (EU). I feel that the two singles an artist releases, one for NA and one for EU clearly illustrate the differences in the two different lifestyles. What's funny though is that no matter where I go I cannot escape the GAGA.

Everyone is talking about GAGA as she is something new. In all actuality there is nothing new. It may have evolved but it's not new. Other internet raging homos have been calling out X-tina for copying Gaga when in all actuality Aguilera did it before her and is now being called out by these other internet bloggers for copying Gaga. And in fact Guilera took it from Brittany who took it from Madonna who took it from Cher who in all actuality took if from that Fleetwood Bird. All Lady Gaga does its take run of the mill productions (sorry RedOne but you should really be doing your own thing instead of shitty pop music*) and then takes a colostomy bag or an  Ostomy Pouching System and place it on her head.


Thats it for me for now, but I did just crack a 40 of Ciroc and its mad jet lag so dont be surprised if you hear more from the DeGeneral!
MOTHER FUCKS!



* Red One makes some dirty productions but we at BOF our living in an EDM world so why not shine!

5.15.2010

Out Blackin'...

... with the Slow Comfortable Screw Boi chugging down Rusty Nails, motherfuck!

5.01.2010

Dumb-Ass Girl Alliances

As much as we're just d-y-i-n-g to break the art of Dumb-Ass Girl Alliances down for all of those who aren't in the know, we must remember that good magicians NEVER reveal their tricks. And when it comes to the D.A.G.A., there is no question: the DJ'Enerate and myself are straight-up Christopher Nolan's 'The Prestige'.

All we can do is encourage you to watch this video of The King himself, keep the words "I didn't come here to work, I came here to play" firmly in mind before turning any kind of so-called charm on, implement the D.A.G.A. strategy into your 'game', find someone who you'll refuse to help if they won't help you, establish trust from the outset, pinky swear on it, make power moves with your Hidden Immunity Idol (a whole other subject), never forget to constantly reassure them that "It's just going to be me and you...", and have faith they are just gullible enough to believe it. We're willing to bet they are.

If it works, count on yourself being the puppet master for the night. You'll have them all doing whatever you want them to do. If you tell them to run, they are going to run. If you tell them to stop, they'll stop. And when you're finished with them, just throw them in the trash.

The whole point is you got to be able to do it without them knowing that you're the one pulling the strings. Very simple.

So, without further adieu...
Dumb-Ass Girl Alliances. Master the art. Thank us later.

Oh yeah, and there is no limit to the amount of times you may express that "This is real..."